It happens EVERY SINGLE TIME

Okay, I'm just going to blow off some steam here.

I'm not sure if I embarrassed myself at the grocery store this morning or if other moms are with me on this one. Not sure if the employees were whispering and pointing after my episode in aisle 3 or not, I was afraid to make eye contact with anyone. Okay, so you know I have 2 boys. Love em both, should go without saying but I always feel the need to say that because it's usually just one of them that I complain about. My oldest is about as high maintenance as it gets. He's cute, he's smart, he's athletic and he's been a giant pain in my butt the whole summer. Okay, enough back story. So, at Publix he's jacking around (as usual) I'm talking about getting way ahead of me, NEVER looking where he's going, not paying attention to anything. He seems to be at circus try-outs. I always get the feeling that people are looking at me wondering if this is the very first time I've introduced my children to civilization, that maybe they've been overprotected and in the house until this very moment. Back to this morning. First lecture occurred in aisle one (produce) where they were poking holes in the over ripe peaches while I was looking for the perfect shade of bananas. I forget the second lecture, but recall another dispute. Then, we get to aisle 3 (soda and bread) It's early, so there are a couple of stockers in this row with their pallets on the trolley things. I've got several things to gather in this aisle. The kids are bouncing back and forth like a pinball machine going up and down the aisle. Of course, these giant pallet pushers don't see my kids and they're about to be knocked over when I firmly ask them to move out of the way. Holden grabs the back of Jackson's shirt causing Jackson to lose his balance and go flying into the bottom of a display bumping his head. He starts crying loudly and I don't even move. People, I didn't care. That was the thing. I showed no sympathy whatsoever. I think I shocked the stockers a bit. I hoisted my 6 1/2 year old into the baby seat and told him he was going to sit there for the remainder of the trip. And he did. And, of course, complained about it the entire time. My jaw is tense, my heart rate is up and I could use a cocktail at 8:30am.

School starts in 6 days! Hooray!

It's Been Awhile (again)

I've been quite the slacker, well in some areas. I just downloaded pictures and thought I'd share a few from the last several months. Thanks for checking in, whoever you are.

Jenni

Make an on-line slideshow at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Peek-a-Boo

Yea, I still exist. And it's not Charisse this time either. But that sh*t was funny. My excuses, well, let's see, lazy, don't know what to say, have already wasted so much time on the computer that I didn't get around to it, and then it had been soooooo long since a post that I felt that to come back would require some extreme wit, profound verse, amazing news, you know, something extremely blogworthy. I've had many adventures and taken tons of adorable pictures of my kids that I could've shared, sorry. Who am I even talking to?? I know, Hi Charisse!! Seriously, that is the biggest reason I stopped blogging. NONE of my friends or family reads it. So, how silly am I to keep up with an online journal for people I don't even know. I really like Charisse's friends, I feel like I know them from reading all of their blogs. I love you Amy, you crack my sh*t up! Narci, I am so excited you are having another boy!!!! Sarah, your girls are precious and I love how apparent it is that you just adore your family. It inspires me to stop my dang complaining all of the time and appreciate my cuties for all of their greatness. I also read Pioneer Woman's blog for all of the reasons you do too.

I will try to post more often for you, Charisse! (Cause I miss you and you alone are so worth it!)

Farewell

I wish I could say that Jenni would start off this New Year by keeping us up to date on how her family is doing...a funny post, a quick picture, a love note, a story about her psycho cat.....anything at all. The truth be told, she "just isn't that into us".

Jenni might not agree with that statement, but if she read the book, she would have to agree. So, I am breaking up with all of you, for her.
She will still stalk your blogs, lovingly read about your lives and smile or maybe even skip because of your posts, but she will never, ever come back to her own blog.

It's over. Sadly.

Jenni's impostor writer,
Sassy

Dear Friends....

Dear Friends,
I have to apologize for Jenni's lack of participation in the blog world. You see, I asked her, well, begged her to start a blog. While I lived in Tampa, I got to hear about, see and experience some of the funniest times with Jenni. Her family is great, her kids are smart and adorable and well, Jenni, she is hilarious, forgetful, pretty, smart, forgetful. So, I convinced her to start a blog, by setting it up for her, all of it, down to the header photo. She gave me a quote, and I ran with it. Jenni is so many things to me, so I wanted her to be all of those things to you too...
Anyhow, for the last month and a, well 2 months, she cannot remember her password to login to her blog account.
So, please forgive her while she is on "holiday" from her blog.
I will lovingly remind her of her blog password and she (hopefully) will resume her once every 6 weeks entries so that those of us that don't live near her can experience what a riot she is. Plus, the bonus of seeing how adorable her children are as they grow up. Oh, maybe I will scan her Christmas card and post it for her....
Love,
Jenni's blog impostor, Charisse

Funny Boys

Okay, real quick, I HAVE to share some funny anecdotes from the boys:

Holden says to me last night, "Mommy, I have to tell you something I noticed about old people when we were visiting Gammy last week. "

Okay, honey.

They have cobwebs growing all over their feet and their toes are stuck together.

I'm thinking, hmmm, that's pretty gross, what could he be talking about? Hmmm Hmmm Hmmmmm....

OH! Holden, I think you're talking about PANTYHOSE!

Some questions Jackson's asked me at bedtime that he's given quite a bit of thought to:

Who drives the roller coasters?
Why don't worms have legs?

Life is good.

Well, my little buddy began his school year and thus kick started the "mommy adventures". Let me tell you the plan. Go DIRECTLY to the Y after drop off. Work out, come home and do some tidying and perhaps dinner prep work. Marvelous, organized, enviable. Well, the first day, like a kid in a candy store I wandered into T.J. Maxx. Whew! Talk about fun. I perused every aisle. Tried on purses, shoes, sniffed lotions and soaps, considered frames and candles, went potty and truly just made myself at home. The next couple of adventures, and minus about $500 in my bank account (seriously), I did some tweaking. So, back to the original plan, work out and GO HOME. It's still quite luxurious. The sound of silence is beautiful. I actually make head way in the domestic department. Because you know how it goes when you're cleaning the house with the kids around. They're 1 room away dumping sand out of their shoes, sprinkling crumbs, emptying bins of toys...
Life is good.